Gilmartin v. Gilmartin , 263 N.C. App. 104 ( 2018 )


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  •                 IN THE COURT OF APPEALS OF NORTH CAROLINA
    No. COA18-466
    Filed: 18 December 2018
    Pasquotank County, No. 16-CVD-473
    TRACIE LEE GILMARTIN, Plaintiff,
    v.
    MICHAEL THOMAS GILMARTIN, Defendant.
    Appeal by defendant from order entered 6 December 2017 by Judge Robert
    Trivette in District Court, Pasquotank County. Heard in the Court of Appeals 17
    October 2018.
    Michael P. Sanders, P.C., by Michael P. Sanders, for plaintiff-appellee.
    Frank P. Hiner, IV and Brett A. Lewis, for defendant-appellant.
    STROUD, Judge.
    Defendant appeals from a permanent alimony order. Because defendant has
    failed to provide a complete record for review on appeal, we affirm the trial court’s
    order on the issues which this Court cannot review without the missing transcript.
    As to defendant’s remaining issue regarding marital fault, we affirm.
    I.    Background
    On 28 June 2016, plaintiff-wife filed a complaint against defendant-husband
    alleging that the parties married in 2006, had one child, and separated in June of
    2016. Wife sought child custody, child support, postseparation support, alimony,
    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    equitable distrbution, and an injunction to protect certain assets. Husband answered
    Wife’s complaint alleging several affirmative defenses and also counterclaiming for
    child custody, child support, and equitable distribution (“ED”).
    On 27 March 2017, the trial court entered an order addressing child custody,
    child support, postseparation support, and uninsured medical expenses; this order is
    not at issue on appeal. On 6 December 2017, the trial court entered an alimony order
    which requires Husband to pay Wife $1,100 a month for 48 months. Husband appeals
    the alimony order.
    II.      Record on Appeal
    Husband first contends “the trial court committed reversible error when it
    concluded as a matter of law that [Wife] was entitled to alimony and ordered that
    [Husband] pay [Wife] alimony[.]” (Original in all caps.) Husband raises four sub-
    arguments based upon findings of fact and conclusions of law regarding Wife’s status
    as dependent spouse, judicial notice of financial affidavits, and sufficiency of the
    evidence regarding the parties’ accustomed standard of living during the marriage.
    Husband also challenges numerous findings of fact as unsupported by the evidence.
    Since Husband’s arguments are based upon the sufficiency of the evidence to
    support the trial court’s findings regarding various financial aspects of the case, we
    must determine whether there was sufficient financial evidence to support the
    findings.
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    Decisions regarding the amount of alimony
    are left to the sound discretion of the trial
    judge and will not be disturbed on appeal
    unless there has been a manifest abuse of that
    discretion. When the trial court sits without a
    jury, the standard of review on appeal is
    whether there was competent evidence to
    support the trial court‘s findings of fact and
    whether its conclusions of law were proper in
    light of such facts.
    An abuse of discretion has occurred if the decision is
    manifestly unsupported by reason or one so arbitrary that
    it could not have been the result of a reasoned decision.
    Kelly v. Kelly, 
    228 N.C. App. 600
    , 601, 
    747 S.E.2d 268
    , 272–73 (2013) (citations and
    quotation marks omitted).
    But our record on appeal includes only a portion of the trial transcript, so we
    cannot review any issues of sufficiency of the evidence. Husband has waived these
    issues on appeal by providing only a portion of the transcript and leaving out portions
    relevant to his appeal. It is clear from the transcript that the claims for ED and
    alimony were heard on the same day. The trial started with the ED claim and then
    the trial court heard the alimony portion of the case.
    Our transcript on appeal begins with page 1 -- but in middle of the hearing --
    as the court reporter apparently transcribed only part of the hearing. The transcript
    begins with Wife’s attorney explaining, “I have a witness here under subpoena, and
    he’s had to sleep through the E.D. so if I can go ahead and call him and try to get him
    out of here.” (Emphasis added.) The witness gave brief testimony and was released.
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    Later, during the testimony and arguments, there were references to the ED portion
    of the hearing that had just transpired. For example, Wife’s testimony includes the
    following questions and answers:
    Q.    You testified during the ED portion of this
    that you have three children; is that correct?
    A.     Yes.
    ....
    Q.      Did you hear those numbers I read to
    Mr.Gilmartin earlier about net profits for the business off
    of the tax returns?
    A.     Yes.
    ....
    Q. And I know we went through this in ED, but I‘m
    going to ask you again, did you invest some or all of the
    retirement monies that you took out into Bottomline?
    A.     Yes.
    (Emphasis added.) At the end of the hearing, Husband’s attorney began his closing
    argument, “May it please The Court and Mr. Sanders. Your Honor, addressing
    equitable distribution first.” (Emphasis added.)     Thus, it is clear that the trial court
    heard the claims of ED and alimony at the same hearing, but Husband provided only
    the second portion of the transcript. And most of Husband’s challenges to the findings
    of fact as unsupported are based upon the lack of financial evidence that would quite
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    logically have been included in the ED portion of the trial, which may be why it was
    not repeated in the alimony portion of the trial.
    Husband, citing to pages 1-108 of the transcript, the entire transcript but for
    the closing arguments, argues, “No financial affidavit was introduced for [Wife] at
    trial and, in fact, no exhibits were introduced at the alimony hearing.” But pages 1-
    108 are only the alimony portion of the hearing, so we have no way of knowing what
    exhibits were introduced or what discussion, if any, occurred about the financial
    affidavit during the equitable distribution phase. Husband may not have intended
    to misrepresent the record before the trial court to this Court, but because a
    substantial portion of the transcript particularly relevant to his argument on appeal
    is missing, we cannot review the sufficiency of the evidence.
    It is the duty of the appellant to ensure this Court has everything needed for a
    proper review of his issues on appeal. See State v. Davis, 
    191 N.C. App. 535
    , 539, 
    664 S.E.2d 21
    , 24 (2008) (“We note that State’s exhibit 18, the videotaped interview of
    K.T., was not included as an exhibit to the record on appeal and was not recorded on
    the trial transcript. It is the duty of the appellant to ensure that all documents and
    exhibits necessary for an appellate court to consider his assignments of error are part
    of the record or exhibits.”). Further, “[a]n appellate court is not required to, and
    should not, assume error by the trial judge when none appears on the record before
    the appellate court.” State v. Williams, 
    274 N.C. 328
    , 333, 
    163 S.E.2d 353
    , 357 (1968).
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    Accordingly, we affirm the trial court’s order as to these issues on appeal. See King
    v. King, 
    146 N.C. App. 442
    , 445-46, 
    552 S.E.2d 262
    , 265 (2001) (“Plaintiffs also argue
    the trial court erred in entering findings of facts and conclusions of law concerning
    damages to Plaintiffs’ property that were not supported by the evidence. Because
    Plaintiffs have failed to include a transcript of evidence from the hearing in this matter
    or any evidence which would enable this Court to determine whether the trial court’s
    findings of fact are supported by competent evidence, we overrule this assignment of
    error. Accordingly, the trial court’s findings of fact and conclusions of law concerning
    damages to Plaintiffs’ property are affirmed. (emphasis added) (citation and
    quotation marks omitted)).
    III.   Alimony Factors
    Husband next challenges the amount and duration of the alimony award.
    Husband contends that
    the trial court committed reversible error when it ordered
    defendant to pay plaintiff alimony in the sum of $1,100.00
    per month for forty-eight months when the court did not
    have sufficient competent evidence to order alimony in any
    amount and the court failed to provide a factual basis for
    the duration of alimony?
    (Original in all caps.) Again, due to the incomplete transcript, we cannot review the
    sufficiency of the evidence. The order on appeal has findings of fact on some of the
    alimony factors enumerated in North Carolina General Statute § 50-16.3A(b), and we
    must assume they are supported by the evidence. And since findings for a particular
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    factor are only required if evidence was presented on that factor, we must also assume
    the trial court made findings addressing all of the factors for which evidence was
    presented. See generally 
    N.C. Gen. Stat. § 50-16
    .3A(b-c) (2017) (noting as to the 16
    factors the trial “court shall make a specific finding of fact on each of the” “relevant
    factors” in subsection (b) only “if evidence is offered on that factor”). The trial court
    made findings of fact regarding many of the factors, including “marital misconduct[,]”
    “relative earnings[,]” “ages” of the parties, “amount and sources” of income, “duration
    of the marriage[,]” and “standard of living of the spouses established during the
    marriage[.]” The trial court also concluded, “The award of alimony is equitable
    considering all relevant factors, including those set forth in NCGS Section 50-
    16.3A(b)” and “[t]he relevant factors support alimony in the amount designated and
    for the designated duration.” (Emphasis added.) Again, “[a]n appellate court is not
    required to, and should not, assume error by the trial judge when none appears on
    the record before the appellate court.” Williams, 
    274 N.C. at 333
    , 
    163 S.E.2d at 357
    .
    And again, we affirm. See King, 146 N.C. App. at 445-46, 
    552 S.E.2d at 265
    .
    IV.    Martial Fault
    Husband also contends, “the trial court committed reversible error when it
    found that [Husband] committed marital fault even though [Wife] failed to allege a
    lack of provocation, [Wife] condoned defendant’s behavior and plaintiff, in her
    complaint, failed to allege the nature of the ‘indignities’ she suffered during the
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    marriage.” (Original in all caps.) Because marital fault concerns only alimony and
    is not dependent upon the financial circumstances of the parties, and we have that
    portion of the transcript, we are able to review these issues on appeal.
    Decisions regarding the amount of alimony
    are left to the sound discretion of the trial
    judge and will not be disturbed on appeal
    unless there has been a manifest abuse of that
    discretion. When the trial court sits without a
    jury, the standard of review on appeal is
    whether there was competent evidence to
    support the trial court’s findings of fact and
    whether its conclusions of law were proper in
    light of such facts. An abuse of discretion has
    occurred if the decision is manifestly
    unsupported by reason or one so arbitrary
    that it could not have been the result of a
    reasoned decision.
    One of the factors that a trial court must take into
    account in awarding alimony, when relevant, is marital
    misconduct. 
    N.C. Gen. Stat. § 50
    –16.3A(b)(1) (2011).
    Marital misconduct includes indignities rendering the
    condition of the other spouse intolerable and life
    burdensome during the marriage and on or before the date
    of separation.
    Our courts have declined to specifically define
    indignities, preferring instead to examine the
    facts on a case by case basis. Indignities
    consist of a course of conduct or repeated
    treatment over a period of time including
    behavior such as unmerited reproach, studied
    neglect, abusive language, and other
    manifestations     of    settled    hate   and
    estrangement.
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    Opinion of the Court
    Dechkovskaia v. Dechkovskaia, 
    232 N.C. App. 350
    , 356, 
    754 S.E.2d 831
    , 836 (2014)
    (citations, quotation marks, brackets, and footnote omitted).
    A.    Sufficiency of Allegations in Complaint
    Citing Dechkovskaia, Husband argues Wife “must allege a lack of provocation
    as to the cause of [Husband’s] alleged marital conduct[.]” (Original in all caps).    In
    other words, Husband contends that Wife must specifically allege that she did not do
    anything to provoke Husband to use pornography and solicit women online,
    presumably every time he did this over the years, despite the fact that he hid his
    actions from her.     Husband also contends Wife failed to properly allege in her
    complaint “the nature of the ‘indignities’ she suffered[.]” (Original in all caps.)
    Wife’s claim was based upon North Carolina General Statute § 50-16.3A, and
    she alleged Husband had engaged in “marital misconduct,” specifically “[i]llict sexual
    behavior” and “[i]ndignities” as enumerated in North Carolina General Statute § 50-
    16.1A(3). See 
    N.C. Gen. Stat. § 50-16
    .1A(3) (2015). Wife also included specific factual
    allegations about the nature of the indignities: “including but not limited to the
    repeated and addictive use of pornography and the use of social media sites for dating
    and flirting with other women.” Although Husband did not file a Rule 12(b)(6) motion
    to dismiss the alimony claim, and his brief does not rely upon Rule 12(b)(6), his
    argument is that Wife’s claim for alimony based upon indignities should be dismissed
    for failure to state a claim because her complaint failed to allege provocation and
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    identify the indignities with enough detail. See generally N.C. Gen. Stat. § 1A-1, Rule
    12(b)(6) (2015) (noting a party may make a motion to dismiss a claim for “[f]ailure to
    state a claim upon which relief can be granted”). Thus, as it is the substance of
    defendant’s argument, we treat his objection as a Rule 12(b)(6) motion to dismiss for
    failure to state a claim.
    In Shingledecker v. Shingledecker the defendant-husband made a motion to
    dismiss the plaintiff-wife’s claim for divorce from bed and board based upon
    “constructive abandonment, cruel and barbarous treatment and indignities” for
    failure to state a claim for relief because she had “failed to allege that the actions
    were perpetrated without adequate provocation.” 
    103 N.C. App. 783
    , 784–86, 
    407 S.E.2d 590
    -91 (1991). This Court noted the ancient cases supporting the defendant-
    husband’s argument regarding provocation, but held that his motion to dismiss was
    not properly presented on appeal:
    To be sure, defendant’s contention was supported by cases
    decided prior to the enactment of the North Carolina Rules
    of Civil Procedure at G.S. § 1A-1. See, e.g., Brooks v. Brooks,
    
    226 N.C. 280
    , 284, 
    37 S.E.2d 909
    , 912 (1946) (stating that
    the failure of a complaint seeking a divorce from bed and
    board on the grounds of abandonment to allege “lack of
    adequate provocation” is a fatal defect); Ollis v. Ollis, 
    241 N.C. 709
    , 711, 
    86 S.E.2d 420
    , 421 (1955) (In alleging cruel
    and barbarous treatment, it is not enough for the wife to
    allege the husband has been abusive and violent towards
    her, that she has been made to fear for her safety. She must
    go further and allege specific acts and conduct on the part
    of the husband. She must also set forth what, if anything,
    she did to start or feed the fire of discord. The omission of
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    such allegations] is fatal. Id.); Cushing v. Cushing, 
    263 N.C. 181
    , 
    139 S.E.2d 217
     (1964) (One who bases a claim for
    alimony without divorce on the ground of indignities is
    required “not only to set out with particularity those acts
    which constituted such indignities but also to show that
    those acts were without adequate provocation.” 
    Id. at 187
    ,
    
    139 S.E.2d at 222
    . An omission to make the necessary
    allegations is fatal. McDowell v. McDowell, 
    243 N.C. 286
    ,
    288, 
    90 S.E.2d 544
    , 545 (1955)).
    Following the enactment of the Rules of Civil
    Procedure in 1967, this court in Concrete Service Corp. v.
    Investors Group, Inc., 
    79 N.C. App. 678
    , 
    340 S.E.2d 755
    ,
    cert. denied, 
    317 N.C. 333
    , 
    346 S.E.2d 137
     (1986),
    specifically addressed the propriety of appealing motions of
    this type. There, we fashioned the following rule of
    procedural law:
    Where an unsuccessful motion to dismiss is
    grounded on an alleged insufficiency of the
    facts to state a claim for relief, and the case
    thereupon proceeds to judgment on the
    merits, the unsuccessful movant may not on
    an appeal from the final judgment seek
    review of the denial of the motion to dismiss.
    
    Id.
     at N.C. App. at 682-83, 
    340 S.E.2d at 758-759
    .
    Inasmuch as we find Concrete Service Corp. to be
    controlling on this issue, we conclude that defendant’s
    motion to dismiss is not properly presented by this appeal.
    
    Id.
     at 786–87, 407 S.E.2d at 591 (quotation marks, ellipses, and brackets omitted).
    Although Shingledecker addressed a claim for divorce from bed and board instead of
    alimony, the law regarding lack of provocation is the same, and Husband’s argument
    that Wife’s claim should be dismissed is the same. See id. at 784-87, 407 S.E.2d at
    590-91. In accord with Shingledecker, Husband’s motion to dismiss “is not properly
    presented by this appeal.” Id. at 787, 
    407 S.E.2d 591
    . This argument is overruled.
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    Opinion of the Court
    B.    Condonation
    Husband next contends “the trial court erred when it did not find that [Wife]
    condoned the [Husband’s] illicit sexual behavior.” (Original in all caps.) Whether
    marital misconduct has been condoned is a question of fact. See generally Gordon v.
    Gordon, 
    88 N.C. 45
    , 50 (1883) (“For even if these facts are not of themselves sufficient,
    they are of such a character as to revive the transactions occurring before the
    separation, and obliterate the condonation arising from the return of the petitioner
    to the house of the defendant.”). Again,
    Decisions regarding the amount of alimony
    are left to the sound discretion of the trial
    judge and will not be disturbed on appeal
    unless there has been a manifest abuse of that
    discretion. When the trial court sits without a
    jury, the standard of review on appeal is
    whether there was competent evidence to
    support the trial court’s findings of fact and
    whether its conclusions of law were proper in
    light of such facts.
    An abuse of discretion has occurred if the decision is
    manifestly unsupported by reason or one so arbitrary that
    it could not have been the result of a reasoned decision.
    Kelly, 228 N.C. App. at 601, 747 S.E.2d at 272–73 (2013) (citations and quotation
    marks omitted).
    The North Carolina Pattern Jury Instructions succinctly and accurately
    summarize the law regarding condonation:
    In order to condone or forgive marital misconduct, a
    spouse must know that such marital misconduct occurred.
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    This means that before marital misconduct can be forgiven,
    the spouse must have actual knowledge of the marital
    misconduct or have knowledge of facts which would satisfy
    a reasonably prudent person that the marital misconduct
    had been committed. Mere suspicion without facts or
    knowledge to support such suspicion will not suffice. In
    addition, it must appear that a spouse not only knew of the
    marital misconduct, but also accepted it as true.
    A spouse condones or forgives marital misconduct
    when he voluntarily elects to [continue] [resume] the
    marital relationship with the spouse who has committed
    marital misconduct. [Continuation] [Resumption] of the
    marital relationship means voluntary [continuation]
    [renewal] of the husband and wife relationship, as shown
    by the totality of the circumstances.
    [Evidence that the plaintiff and defendant engaged
    in sexual intercourse after the [plaintiff] [defendant]
    forgave his spouse for act(s) of marital misconduct is not
    required.]
    [Evidence of voluntary sexual intercourse between
    the plaintiff and the defendant after the [plaintiff]
    [defendant] has actual knowledge of the adultery
    of his spouse, or has knowledge of facts which would satisfy
    a reasonably prudent person that his spouse had
    committed adultery, is considered evidence of a spouse’s
    forgiveness of adultery on the part of the offending
    spouse, and should be considered with all the other facts
    and circumstances in evidence].
    Forgiveness may be express or implied. Express
    forgiveness is when a [husband] [wife] states to his spouse
    who has committed marital misconduct, “I forgive you for
    (state alleged marital misconduct)” or similar words to that
    effect.
    Forgiveness is implied when a husband and wife
    [continue] [resume] the marital relationship after a spouse
    has knowledge of marital misconduct by his spouse.
    [However, forgiveness is not implied simply because
    spouses live in the same residence.] [Isolated incidents of
    sexual intercourse between the parties do not constitute
    resumption of marital relations.]
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    Opinion of the Court
    N.C.P.I. – Civil 815.71 (footnotes omitted).
    The trial court’s findings relevant to marital fault and condonation, or the lack
    thereof, were as follows:
    23.    Throughout the course of the parties’
    marriage the defendant was addicted to pornography. The
    plaintiff discovered this issue early in the marriage and she
    told the defendant it bothered her. The defendant
    exchanged pornographic photos with others, including a
    nude picture of the plaintiff which was sent to a co-worker
    at the Coast Guard base without the plaintiff’s knowledge
    or consent, and solicited sexual encounters with others on
    the internet. He also left a digital trail of pornographic
    websites on computers and tablets accessible to the
    children.
    24.     The defendant visited and used social media
    sites for flirting and dating and setting up encounters with
    other women. Throughout the marriage the defendant
    repeatedly sought out online sexual encounters with other
    women and saw other women for sexual reasons. He
    admits having two affairs during the course of the
    marriage, one of which was with an exotic dancer and other
    with the teacher of one of the plaintiff’s children.
    25.     The plaintiff confronted the defendant about
    his use of pornography and online sexual solicitations
    during the marriage, to no avail. The defendant’s conduct
    continued. When confronted, the defendant would at first
    deny his conduct, then become angry and defensive and
    accuse the plaintiff of being nosey. He would then become
    contrite and say he was sorry. At one point the defendant
    agreed to go to counseling for his addiction to pornography
    but he stopped attending after a short time. At times the
    plaintiff believed the defendant had changed his ways but
    he never did and this pattern repeated itself throughout
    the marriage.
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    26.     The defendant’s conduct, including his
    addiction to pornography, his affairs and his constant
    solicitations of other women had a devastating effect upon
    the plaintiff. At one point she thought she was going to
    have a nervous breakdown and she began to see a
    therapist, which she continues to do through the present.
    The plaintiff felt guilty about what was happening in her
    marriage and. the defendant’s actions devastated her self-
    esteem.
    27.   Just prior to the parties’ separation their
    relationship appeared to the plaintiff to be on an upswing
    and they had sexual relations about a month prior to the
    separation. However, at this time the defendant was
    deceiving the plaintiff.
    28.    On the date of separation, the parties argued
    over whether the defendant would attend a middle school
    graduation for one of the children. This led to a larger
    argument. Then, with no other forewarning, the defendant
    told the plaintiff that he hated her and that their marriage
    was over.
    Husband does not contest the findings of fact, but rather argues that the trial
    court erred in also failing to make “a finding of condonation on the part of” Wife.
    Husband contends that because Wife was aware of his illicit sexual behavior -- the
    two affairs in 2008 -- but the parties remained together and had intercourse after
    2008, including approximately a month before separation, the trial court erred when
    it failed to make a finding of condonation of his illicit sexual behavior. See generally
    
    N.C. Gen. Stat. § 50-16
    .1A(3)(a) (defining “[i]llicit sexual behavior” as “acts of sexual
    or deviate sexual intercourse, deviate sexual acts, or sexual acts defined in G.S. 14-
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    Opinion of the Court
    27.20(4), voluntarily engaged in by a spouse with someone other than the other
    spouse”). But Husband fails to note almost all of the findings of fact regarding fault
    address indignities, not illicit sexual behavior. The order mentions the 2008 affairs
    specifically only once, in the last sentence of finding 24. The findings focus mostly on
    Husband’s addiction to pornography and communications with women online, noting
    that these were problems “throughout the marriage.” Even if we assume the trial
    court tacitly found Wife had condoned Husband’s illicit sexual behavior in 2008, the
    marital fault of indignities remains.
    Husband’s argument fails to recognize that he had the burden of proof of
    condonation for both illicit sexual behavior and indignities, and these are separate
    and independent grounds for marital fault.1 See 
    N.C. Gen. Stat. § 50-16
    .1A(3). Even
    if the affairs in 2008 were condoned as Husband contends, he did not show
    condonation of indignities.
    In Earles v. Earles, the plaintiff-wife had alleged both abandonment and
    indignities as marital faults. 
    26 N.C. App. 559
    , 562-63, 
    216 S.E.2d 739
    , 742 (1975).
    The defendant-husband argued that the trial court erred by not instructing the jury
    on the issue of condonation of abandonment, and this Court determined that the trial
    1  The North Carolina Pattern Jury Instructions point out that each type of marital misconduct
    for which evidence is presented must be addressed separately. See N.C.P.I. – Civil 815.71 n.5. The
    instruction on condonation notes that “[t]o avoid confusion in the event it is contended that more than
    one type of marital misconduct has been condoned, it may be necessary to specify with particularity
    the types of marital misconduct involved and to submit a separate sub-issue as to each.” 
    Id.
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    Opinion of the Court
    court did not need to instruct on condonation of abandonment because the defendant
    did not present any evidence of condonation of this marital fault; all of his evidence
    of condonation related to the indignities. Id. at 563, 216 S.E.2d at 743. Here, the
    trial court’s findings of fault are based upon the indignities, and Husband has not
    directed us to any evidence of condonation of his addictive use of pornography and
    seeking other women on social media websites. Instead, the evidence and findings
    show just the opposite: Husband was deceiving Wife regarding his continuing use of
    pornography and online sexual solicitations.           Whenever Wife discovered what
    Husband was doing and objected, he would first deny and then acknowledge his
    actions and promise to stop.       The fact that Husband and Wife continued to live
    together and even have sexual relations would not condone these indignities, since
    Wife would have had to have full knowledge of Husband’s continuing pornography
    use and online solicitations to condone these actions, and a spouse can conduct
    marital fault
    only with knowledge of what there is to forgive. Suspicion
    that the other spouse has committed a matrimonial offense
    like adultery will not make continued cohabitation amount
    to condonation. The accused must demonstrate that the
    complaining spouse had actual knowledge of the marital
    offense or had facts which would satisfy a reasonably
    prudent person that the offense had been committed. In
    addition, it must appear that the complaining spouse not
    only knew of the marital misconduct, but also accepted it
    as true. Moreover where the accused spouse is guilty of
    several acts of marital misconduct and the complaining
    spouse knows of only one of them, the complaining spouse
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    Opinion of the Court
    has condoned only the known misconduct. A spouse might
    forgive certain acts of adultery with certain people, for
    example, but not forgive others.
    N.C.P.I. – Civil 815.71 n.9 (quotation marks, ellipses, and brackets, and parenthesis
    omitted) (citing 6 Lee’s § 6.19(B)).
    Husband argues that trial court’s finding that he “was deceiving” Wife “does
    not make sense” because he had admitted his illicit sexual behavior in 2008 to Wife
    and several years passed before they separated. But the deception the trial court
    found related to the indignities, not the illicit sexual behavior. Even if Wife condoned
    the 2008 affairs, Wife could not have condoned Husband’s continuing “use of
    pornography and online sexual solicitations” because Husband “deceiv[ed]” her into
    believing he had ceased the behavior. Husband does not contend that Wife had full
    knowledge at all times of his continuing pornography use and online solicitations nor
    that she ever acquiesced to his actions. Wife testified about finding pornography on
    their home computer, iPad, and cell phone, where their children could be exposed to
    it, and the oldest child did see it. Wife also testified about finding that Husband was
    “[r]egistering on dating sites. Searching for sex on Craig’s List.       Other women
    exchanging photos.” Wife was upset about these findings and felt “[h]orrible.” When
    Wife confronted Husband about the pornography and on-line solicitations,
    [h]e would admit to it after I would find it out, but then he
    would be angry because I was playing detective according
    to him, trying to find him doing things that were wrong.
    And we would have a disagreement and then it would come
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    down to, you know, he was sorry and he wasn’t going to do
    it again. But then it came down to he couldn’t not do it
    again. So it became -– it was a problem.
    Q.   So you would confront him and his first
    reaction would be to become angry?
    A.     No, he would just deny it. He would just deny
    it.
    The evidence and findings indicate that Husband denied the indignities, and
    when Wife confronted him with proof, he would admit what he had done and agree to
    counseling, but then he stopped the counseling and continued the misconduct, and
    “[a]t times the plaintiff believed the defendant had changed his ways but he never
    did and this pattern repeated itself throughout the marriage.” The trial court further
    found that Husband “lied to and deceived” Wife “throughout the marriage[.]” The
    evidence supports the trial court’s findings of fact regarding indignities, and the trial
    court did not make any findings regarding condonation of the indignities because
    Husband did not present any evidence that Wife ever had sufficient knowledge of his
    actions to condone them. When Wife did become aware of Husband’s actions, she
    objected and asked him to stop, but he continued his behavior surreptitiously. This
    argument is overruled.
    V.     Conclusion
    For the foregoing reasons, we affirm.
    AFFIRMED.
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    GILMARTIN V. GILMARTIN
    Opinion of the Court
    Judge DILLON concurs.
    Judge BERGER concurs in the result only.
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